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By Sara Secora, April 6th 2020
My answer was ever changing; morphing as rapidly as I was growing. At one point, I wanted to be a veterinarian or zookeeper to satiate my love for animals, then for a long while I wanted to be a defense attorney to make a difference, and then came the phase when I wanted to be popstar, but then, who didn’t want that at some point?
Like a shooting star in a lightning storm, I was afire, burning with a need to express my inner workings. All those bottled up feelings, those hardships, those curious embers. I needed to get them out in a new way. Clueless and burdened, I started with a sentence, and before I knew it, the page was no longer empty. I became overwhelmed at the endless possibilities before me; I could write anything, anyone, anywhere. There was no tether attached to me, not in regards to writing, and that was the most awakening revelation of all. Unlocked before me was a portal outside of myself and my world, and I wanted to jump in with reckless abandon.
During that tenderfoot time, I unknowingly lacked structure, proper grammatical understanding, and countless other skills required to write within today’s standards. Although, in truth, none of that mattered to my teenage mind as I was riding a serotonin wave of excitement as I explored my own imagination even further. Moreover, it was insignificant to me because I kept my writing tightly under lock and key. No one laid eyes on my writing. So while I didn’t possess many of the key components that would make my manuscript sparkle, I did, however, successfully birth a story idea that would follow me for the next nine years of my life (and onward.)
With no surprise to myself, the fantasy genre had almost exclusively drawn me into the literary world, so it was only natural that I focused my efforts there. It began with a sprout, just a singular character, the one who would tell my story to the reader.
I admittedly used echoes of myself as the template for Amethysta. It was the obvious choice for a new writer, doing so allowed me to seamlessly write more authentically by giving a fantasy twist to my real-world experiences and hardships. I briefly touched upon this subject, the hidden roots to Amethysta’s story, within the acknowledgments section of Throne of Lies. That vulnerable choice was one I heavily debated as I had never before publicly disclosed my mental disorders. While that rabbit hole goes much deeper than I’ve previously lead on, that is for another day—another blog.
“This story is more than just a fantasy tale – it’s also a part of me. So, in a way, allowing others to crawl into this world I’ve created is quite intimate and terrifying. Just as Amethysta faces her fears, so do I. There’s a shadow of a deeper meaning hidden within the pages of this book about myself. A secret that I’ve kept quiet from most for my entire life. You see, Amethysta’s struggles with controlling her magic was expressed in a way that relates to my lifelong experiences with panic attacks.”
Many see the final product, a book resting peacefully on a shelf, yet they don’t see the many challenges that were faced to get it there. I wish it to be known that my nine-year journey of writing Throne of Lies was not a constant one. There were times when I went as long as two to three years without even glancing at my manuscript. Times when I questioned myself and times when life felt too heavy for me to lift my hands and write. Although, in truth, the story was never far from my thoughts. Amethysta and the world of Vataenya were vivid in my mind like real places and people.
At twenty-three something flipped, something changed.
For the first time since beginning my writing journey, I felt as though I was going to finish this book and put it out into the world for others to read. I was bubbly with excitement as I daydreamed about what it all meant to become an author: having my book on shelves, reading reviews of those who found joy in my words, knowing my story meant something to someone other than just myself. Those were the good things, but lost in the excitement, I hadn’t considered the bad then. I was utterly unaware the troubles that were headed my way. I would soon learn that as it turns out, writing a book is so much more than just writing. The hard lesson was coming, and so was the time when I’d come face to face with the darkest parts of self-doubt.
Author of the Amethysta Trilogy and the Poet behind Dear Wallflower, Sara Secora dons’ various creative hats, all of which brim beneath her curiosity and imagination. Whether wielding a pen or microphone, Secora expresses herself day by day through the art of words. You can find her in the heart of Metro Detroit, Michigan, working as a professional voice actress, while continuing to write whimsical stories full of enchantment, mystique, and insight—destined to intrigue readers of any age.
To learn more, please visit: www.SaraSecora.com
We are an Imprint Brand with Bookish Goodies,
and Self-Publishing Resources.